Today was a day filled with so much emotions, that I am not even sure where to begin. Let's start with the feeling of privileged and honor. Not just for Paul and I, but for my dad. It was a very special moment for him to watch his grandson stand in the very same position that he was in at the same age. I watched as Dustin took his oath and could see the pride and sheer emotion in my dad's eyes. It was so precious. I was so happy that he could share this moment with Dustin. Who better knows what is going through Dustin's head at this time? As a mother, I have experienced pride, love, worry, and every other emotion you could think of. But that feeling is something Dustin and my dad can only experience between the two of them. Then, just when I think I could not be prouder, my dad saluted my son and shook the hands of many of the young men who where sitting there. Very touching moment. I saw the look in Dustin's eyes as he watched his grandfather shake those hands. It was a look of adoration, pride, and sheer love. It was awesome! I have seen very few things bring tears to my daddy's (and yes, all three of us girls still call him daddy) eyes over the years, but these tears where different. These where special.
I experienced the feeling of remorse. There were probably over forty people sworn into different branches of the military today. All had family there or someone to support them. All...except for one. He was all by himself. Not much older then Dustin and when the Red Cross had them fill out their emergency contact cards, the kid simple looked at the gentleman and stated, "I don't need one. There is no one to call." How awful!!! Dustin and I were talking about it later on, and I told him how it made me feel. I simply said, "Everyone should have someone, especially a soldier. Even if it is just someone to let know when something goes wrong. A friend, and aunt, a pastor, someone." He agreed. I still can't get that young man out of my mind. Here Dustin is with all these people who love and support him, and then there is this one young man with nobody. I truly pray that God holds this boy in his hands and watches over him.
As the time went I could see Dustin getting antsy to leave. He was tired and worn, but ready. The one thing that we have learned is that everything happens on Uncle Sam's time clock. We didn't even know he was flying out of Grand Rapids until they boarded the bus. I finally (along with other mothers) broke into tears. We could tell that between grandpa, mom, and everyone else tearing up, it was starting to get to him. We were not able to go to the airport, and feel that it was probably for the best...for everyone. I called his Aunt who lives in Grand Rapids to meet him before he boarded the plane. She and my nephews where able to say good luck and see ya later. I am sure it meant a lot to Dustin to have that. Plus, I am sure it calmed his nerves considering the boy has never been on a plane in his life. As Paul, I, and the two kids were making our way out of Lansing, my text alert was going off. When I looked down, it was Dustin. It said "Love you mom". My heart just about busted. For about an hour we badgered each other back and forth by text. I left him a couple of his favorite songs to pump him up on Facebook and watched as many of you wished him good luck and Paul and I your prayers and encouragement. I knew, however, that the last text would come as he arrived at the airport. So I hung on to every precious reply hoping that it would stretch out as long as possible. Then there it was..."G2 go mom I love ya so much." Told him I loved him to the moon and back and that he would be awesome. No reply. That was it. The tears started coming again. It is funny how much a few small phrases can mean so much. I am okay although my body is suffering from all the emotions and physical wear. I just need rest, some extra meds, and time. After all, I wasn't in the best of health when this all started. Paul and I have spent so much time and energy worrying about the kids, Dustin, grandparents, and everybody else that we haven't even had time to really absorb everything for ourselves. Something we need to do, and do together.
No amount of words can express how proud of my son I am right now and how much I miss him already. However, for some reason my mind keeps going back to that young man today with no one to shed tears for him. When I started this blog it was to keep all you updated on Dustin, maybe help another Army mom get through it, and to journal this chapter in our lives. For some reason, I feel that it serves a greater purpose now. My son is not the only young person out there to give of themselves for us and our country. Sure there are young people who make that choice because it is a way out. A way out of the situation they are in, or maybe they feel it is the only option they have because school was not easy for them. Dustin had many choices and a dream. In the end, he chose to chase his dream. (By the way, college would have been my first choice. ha!) But does it matter? Does it matter what age, sex, race, or situation the soldier comes from? Does it matter if they do laundry, cook, or become a Forward Observer (what Dustin chose). Which by the way I am still having a hard time with. (I should have never Googled it). It shouldn't matter. So I ask that you not only pray for all these young men and women and their families, but extend a caring hand. I'm not talking about cooking, giving money, or anything like that. A hug, a hand shake, or just a thank you. Those mean more than anything you could ever imagine. This is my goal for myself. I know that I get so tied up in motherhood, work, and everything else that I forget. I strife to be better about it. I owe it to my son and to all the other military parents and service members out there.
So Dustin will fly into Dallas (called while I was writing this and is there), catch a plain to Oklahoma City, and be bused into Fort Sill sometime tonight. It will probably be very late if we hear from him again tonight at all. That's okay. I am a night owl, as most of you know and will wait. When I do go to bed...that's right, the phones are going with me. I feel like a teenage girl waiting on a boy to call me again. You should all know that he was in a great place when he left and when I spoke to him on the phone. He was excited, ready, and absolutely loved the plane ride. Great, next thing he will tell me is he'll be jumping out of them. Oh wait...it was an option. (We won't think of that now.) I know that he would want you all to know that. He doesn't want anyone to worry about him. The worry I have is a "mom's" worry. But every time I talk to him and hear the excitement and certainty in in voice, I feel better. It is crazy, but ever since we learned more details of what he would be doing, so many things came together for us. We truly believe that he is doing what the Lord meant for him to do. It's hard but it is what it is. Thank you so much again. Will try to keep you all posted as much as possible. We wish you all love and many blessings. Oh and...Go Army ;)
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