Something Different...

Well, what started out being a really rotten week, ended up being pretty darn good.  We got another letter today from Dustin.  It was a very unexpected surprise.  I think that he is out to prove me wrong about the not writing home thing.  Ha!  That is fine.  I will let him try his hardest!  Ha!  This letter was a bit longer then the last two.  He mailed it on the 17th.  So, the mail is moving faster.  He passed his second physical fitness test with flying colors.  He was so excited because he beat his last two mile run by like "2, if not 3" minutes.  This tells me so much.  Dustin made working out a part of his life, long before he joined the Army.  He was already in great shape when he left.  So, I know he is still as serious about it has he always was.  He did say that, surprisingly, they had quite a bit of free time.  I think this is partial because Dustin could never sit still.  He was always outside doing stuff, or running the roads.  Ha!!  He misses Dylan and Shelby so much.  He told Shelby that, as soon as he got home, she could start baking.  Dustin was always a sucker for cookies.  Especially homemade cookies.  He said he is doing really well and is very happy.  This brings my mind to ease a bit.  I know that many of the soldiers in training have been having a challenging time.  I am sure Dustin has had his.  But he has managed to keep his spirits up.  He mentioned that many of his friends had received the cards I sent.  He thanked me for them.  It made me feel so good.  Not just for them, but that it helps me feel closer to him.  It is like having a piece of me there.  I always want him to feel that I am there with him.  Maybe not physically, but in spirit.  I know he is missing home a little.  He brought up how much he missed falling asleep in the chair, at night, while the two of us listened to music.  Since I have almost always worked midnights, I have done my housework at night.  If the two younger kids were gone, Dustin and I would put on a little music.  We share a passion for hard rock and heavy metal.  Sometimes, we would put on a little Contemporary Christian music (another favorite we share).  I would clean the kitchen and he would sit while we visited and caught up with everything.  I miss those nights, too.  I miss them very much.  Those talks would go on for hours.  I have always had a very open relationship with my kids.  We both learned so much about each other on those nights.  Oh my goodness!  When I think of the laughs we shared, it makes my gut aches.  Ha!!!  This picture was taken, during one of those nights, about two weeks before he left.

This time it was more then a letter.  There was something different in the words and how it was written.  It made me realize a couple of things.  The first thing is that my little boy has grown into a man.  There were some things of a private nature that concerned me before he left.  I have to say that he put some of them to rest in this letter.  He showed that his priorities have changed and that, although still carefree, he is starting to think things through better before he makes his decisions.  Am I still worried?  Well, of course I am.  I am his mother.  That is my job.  Let's be honest.  When it comes to our children, nothing is ever good enough.  Not any school, job, or boyfriend/girlfriend.  Especially, if those things give us reason to be concerned.  However, my children know that, although I may not always be happy with their decisions, I will always stand behind and be there for them.  They are my children, and they are always my first priority.  If those decisions workout for them.  That's great.  If not, I always explain to them how important it is learn from them.  Today's letter also showed me that all those small memories (along with the big one) are just as special and important to him as they are me.  This is, as they say, reaping the benefits of what you sow.  All the Drill Sergeants in the world can't take those out of a soldiers mind.  When it comes right down to it, it is what gets him through the rough moments.  Just like it does me.  I hang on to those moments.  They are precious beyond believe.  They also comfort me and see me through the same rough times.  I take comfort in knowing that he will have them with him no matter what.  Whether he is stuck in the barracks waiting for the phone to ring, or on a mountainside somewhere in some foreign country oceans away.  They are memories only a parent can give a child, and vice versa.  The tears that fall from my eyes, while remembering them, are not just tears of sadness.  They represent joy, love, and countless other emotions.  Someday, he will share them with his children, as well as make his own. 

Today also brought more good news.  It looks like we are going to get a phone call tomorrow.  Not sure what time, as usual.  Sundays have turned into the one a day everyone makes it a point to be home.  I don't even have to bribe them any!  Ha!  Dylan and Shelby simply tell their friends that they want to be home for Dustin's call.  No one questions it or pressures them.  They have wonderful friends.  Paul and I are so grateful.  They have helped the kids so much.  Let's face it, sometimes you just need a friend.  Mom and dad are just not the same.  A lot to go through, I know, for a 7 minute phone call.  But no amount of money or gold in the world would be worth missing it for.  We will all spend the day watching TV, being on the computer, and enjoying each others company while we wait.  I know that I am not the only mom that will be waiting.  I am sure that I will connect with a few others throughout the day.  They are all just as excited as I am.  Much love and many blessings!!!